ADHD in Girls: What Parents Need to Know
When most people picture ADHD, they imagine a child bouncing off the walls, blurting out answers in class, or constantly forgetting their homework. But for many girls, ADHD looks very different. It can be quiet, subtle, and often missed. Parents are left wondering why their daughter is working so hard, yet still feels overwhelmed or “not good enough.”
Why ADHD in girls often goes unnoticed
Girls with ADHD are more likely to struggle with inattention rather than hyperactivity. Instead of being disruptive, they may seem dreamy, scattered, or slow to finish tasks. Teachers might describe them as “chatty,” “disorganized,” or “not living up to potential.” Because they often work hard to compensate, their struggles may fly under the radar until the demands of school or social life become too much.
Masking and social pressures
Many girls learn to “mask” their ADHD symptoms in order to fit in. They may put extra effort into appearing focused at school or go along with peers to avoid standing out. On the surface, it can look like they are managing well, but inside they may feel exhausted from holding it all together. This masking often delays recognition of ADHD, because adults don’t see the level of effort required to keep up.
The hidden impact
When ADHD is missed, girls may internalize their challenges. Instead of seeing that their brain works differently, they may think “I’m lazy” or “I’m not smart enough.” Over time, this can affect self-esteem and increase the risk of anxiety or depression. Social struggles can also play a role: difficulty picking up on social cues, interrupting without meaning to, or struggling to stay engaged in group conversations can make friendships harder to navigate. For some girls, the stress of trying to manage both school and social life leads to heightened anxiety.
Signs to look for in girls
ADHD in girls often shows up in ways that can be easy to miss. You might notice:
Homework takes forever. Even when she understands the material, getting started is a battle and finishing can drag on for hours.
Daydreaming in class. Teachers may say she “zones out,” misses instructions, or seems off in her own world.
Messy backpack or desk. Papers get crumpled at the bottom, assignments go missing, or she constantly loses water bottles and sweaters.
Big feelings. Small frustrations can lead to tears, slammed doors, or shutting down completely.
Talkative with friends, but struggles to listen. She may interrupt without meaning to, jump between topics, or get told she talks too much.
Avoiding tough tasks. Anything that feels boring or hard, like long readings or multi-step math problems, may lead to procrastination or “forgetting” to do it.
Social worries. She might replay conversations in her head, worry she embarrassed herself, or feel anxious about being left out.
Working harder than peers. You might notice she spends far more time and energy keeping up with schoolwork compared to her classmates.
How an ADHD assessment can help
This is where a comprehensive psychoeducational assessment makes a real difference. At Chickadee Psychology in Calgary, an ADHD assessment does more than a checklist or questionnaire. We look at attention skills alongside learning, memory, and emotional well-being. This helps us understand whether difficulties with focus are linked to ADHD, a learning disability, giftedness, or something else. Clear answers mean families can move forward with practical strategies and the right support at school and at home.
Moving forward
If you recognize your daughter in these signs, you are not alone. Many girls are first identified in upper elementary or middle school, when academic and social demands increase. The earlier ADHD is understood, the sooner you can support your child’s strengths and give her the tools she needs to thrive.
At Chickadee Psychology, we offer ADHD assessments in Calgary designed to give you clear answers and practical next steps. We focus on the whole child, helping families understand not only what the challenges are, but also how to build on strengths.
